It's Fantasy Time!

So, it's that time of year again. Fantasy baseball has started back up and the real season is only a week away. I check my fantasy team at least 5 times a day, but there is nothing to check being the season has yet to start. This has sparked an idea. What are the perils of fantasy baseball?

There is only one. Your significant other will constantly get pissed b/c instead of spending time with her, or paying attention to her while together, you are checking stats, probable lineups, and injury reports. I actually think this "peril" turns into a positive because you actually spend less time (mentally) with said significant other. I can be sitting watching tv with a girlfriend and she'll be blabbering away and unbeknown to me an hour has gone by with me somewhat paying attention to her ramblings. It's a beautiful thing. This may cause some fights however, but a nice flower or dinner usually does the trick.

Here are other potential perils that are actually positives:

-Less time being productive at work (positive is self explanatory)
-Incessantly debating over who you should start or sit (Once you figure it out and you are successful, few things are more joyful)
-Less time being active (Who like to run anyways? Grab your laptop, a beer, some pizza and your day is set)
-Stay in on weekends to figure out lineups (See above, you'll never have a shitty night out ever again)

There are probably others or better ones but I have to go see who's on waivers.

I'm not in Love w/ a Stripper but I am TJ Oshie

Here is the Oshie play from the other day where he annihilates Rick Nash. Nash just happens to be Columbus' "star" player. This game was played in St. Louis and the crowd went crazy.


A day later, they played in Columbus and all of the fans booed Oshie every time he touched the puck. Nash tried to go after Oshie as retaliation to what transpired the previous day. Nash got owned AGAIN! Hilarious!


Keep in mind these announcers are from the Blue Jackets' FSN affiliate and that the Blues won both games. Is Blues hockey back????

HARPO"S

Some Awesome Videos

This is nothing short of amazing. I love how muh pleasure the announcers get out of Tootoo getting his butt kicked.




This article needs to be read. I am pretty sure this is a joke, but I could see this guy pulling this off. I mean can you imagine how many 16 year old girls would hand over thier souls and the rights to everything they are thinking in order to stay on facebook:

http://www.bbspot.com/News/2009/02/facebook-soul-owners.html

Just in Time for the Tournament!

Here's some Gus Johnson for you! Unfortunately, I still can't find, "TAQUAIN DEAN! BAESLINE! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

I would also like to mention that I included this first game b/c a.)it's MU but more importantly, b.) I was in jail during this game and never heard the call or saw the dunk.



And here's two similar ones. One with video the other not.

Happy St. Patrick's Day

This could happen only in Mobile, Alabama.

More Joaquin Phoenix

32 Songs in 8 Minutes

Watch 32 Songs in 8 Minutes on CollegeHumor

Stephen Colbert in Space?

If you don't think The Colbert Report on Comedy Central is funny, you might not have a sense of humor. I'm a big fan of making a farce out of everything, especially the things that people hold most dearly, and this is exactly what Colbert does. Also keep in mind that this is the same man who tried to run for president with Doritos as his sponsor. I guaran-fuckin-tee you that if his name would have appeared on that ballot I would have thrown my patriotism and freedom right out the window and cast a vote for humor, with cool ranch as his running mate. Anyway, NASA has a poll to name some piece of the International Space Station and Colbert has asked Colbet Nation to vote for him. Here's a video.

The Colbert ReportMon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c

Space Module Colbert - William Gerstenmaier

Colbert Report Full Episodes
Political Humor

Rap Battle
NASA Name Contest

And here's where you go to vote.
http://www.nasa.gov/externalflash/name_ISS/index.html

Maybe we could start a DELI campaign to name this piece of space junk. I suggest "Blum."

Jessica Biel as Jessica Rabbit

Jessica Biel is really, really attractive. Dressing her up as a very, very sexy cartoon doesn't take anything away from her. Especially if you like HUGE asses. Does describing a cartoon as sexy make me weird?


And, only because it was on the site where I got the previous clip. Here's Mark Wahlberg talking to animals. So funny.


And finally, the Wii guys, which was on a few weeks ago. Ironically, I do this everyday. And I'm not talking about playing Wii. Lame joke, I know.

Ninja Bear

Clearly this bear is far more coordinated than I am. If I was in charge of this zoo, I would showcase this kung fu bear in duels to the death against the best ninjas from around the world. With skills like that it's just a matter of time before he learns to speak like five languages and takes over the world. He would be our first black bear President. First black President my ass.

Megan Fox

Apparently, Megan Fox may have gotten back together with David Silver (aka Brian Austin Gayeen). My slim hopes of dating her have disappeared yet again. My life is useless. Despite the fact that she is obviously mentally handicapped when it comes to men (which is why I would be perfect) she is about to pitch a shutout (as well as my tent) in our weekly poll. In honor of her hotness, here are random photos:


The above is obviously her head photo shopped on someone's fake boobies and tight abs. I posted this b/c I'm never against fake boobies or photo shopping/airbrushing to make someone look better. Why do you think I always look sexy in pictures?

Here she is spreading her butt cheeks to ease in insertion.






Here's Megan doing her charity work for the Down's Syndrome Society




Here I am hiding my boner.






If you haven't seen this photos yet, go to Egotastic.com. She's wearing pasties but you get the gist of it.




She looks the best in her 'shit' clothes.


God, she dates some douchies.